It's not about us vs them - the Foreigner-Singaporean divide (unedited)

This is our country, our home - we do not have anywhere else to go. Indeed most of us would not want even if we have a choice. But then, why should we? This is our birthplace - where our grandparents, and for some, like myself, our parents came to start lives and homes. This is where we have friends and our rootedness.

All the talk, and some more rowdy than we had wanted or expected has missed the fundamental point. We are descendents of immigrants too. We have been, and remain welcoming to foreigners. Our behavior, as I have been explaining to many foreign friends is defensive - of our way of life specifically.

But why this reaction against them. I am not just talking about over the loss of jobs or livelihood. That is quite understandable if not reasonable. A friend said it best when he gave the example of our overcrowded MRT trains - it is that our personal spaces have been encroached. He compared it to Japan where overcrowding is a common occurrence too but the people respect the boundaries. They keep their basic civilities.

What we are up against is the little things that are negatively changing our living conditions - speak gently (read - not scream) into mobile phones, make effort to be hygienic - (wear some kind of deodorant), insist that we speak in a language because they did not or could not learn English in time. The Singapore that we are familiar with, and one that we so look forward to as a 'developed' society is moving away from us.

So it is with some relief that I listened to PM announced the measures to underscore even further, the Singaporeans First Policy. We need to have 'positive discrimination' - it is a term used some 2 decades ago by then President of SAFRA, our former foreign minister George Yeo when he explained why NSmen must be given their recognition for defending Singapore - when questioned over the benefits proposed.

We must as a people reassert our way of life. Not in a belligerent way but help our foreign friends living in our midst realize that they can add much color to our tapestry but not impose their bad habits on us. Policies that are being re-looked need time to take effect. We must assure them that we are not xenophobic but a famously tolerant society - but we are an intelligent too - taking in the good but rejecting the bad.

The media both mainstream as well as social, can play a critical role in this aspect - we need to highlight positive examples of value-add in the foreign inflow but also flag bad behaviors that upset the social equilibrium that we work hard to achieve.

I was asked recently how this Foreigner-Singaporean divide will play out. Some aspects that had been superseded are unfortunately irreversible. These will take time for adjustments, and hopefully incident-free. On the whole, we need at least 5 to 10 years for the kinks to even out. I am not referring to the completion of the new flats or mrt lines. Those hard power. We need resilient soft power to work it's way in the current fabric of society.